Life is short, LIVE while you can!!!

So this past Monday, we buried my favorite Aunt on my Mother's side and let me just say that the circumstances surrounding her death are by far the strangest and most hurtful I've EVER dealt with!! She was initially declared dead the previous Wednesday as in coded by a Doctor, family was informed, funeral home informed/date set, D-E-A-D. But by the time I was able to reach my Mom 4 hours later, she was alive and well and breathing on her own!!!! WTF is this?????

I haven't asked those who were there what happened because I knew damn well that my Aunt had specifically requested a DNR notation be added to her chart. And I know I couldn't have this conversation without going off on someone!!! What I do know having studied death and dying as a Religion major many moons ago, is that the living can make things unnecessarily difficult for those who want to die with dignity and peace. My Aunt had been a 46 year cervical cancer survivor which is pretty much unheard in the Black community, especially given how primitive cancer treatment was in the 1960's. So why someone thought she needed to be resuscitated against her wishes and allowed to suffer from stage IV metastatic cancer for another 2 days is beyond me!!! What I can tell you is that I haven't yet come to terms with the entire ordeal, as if I'm expecting someone is going call again and tell me that she's really alive again (of course, I know that isn't really going to happen). But for a few hours after I heard she was alive again, I like many other family members, WAS praying for a miracle.

As anyone probably expects, things were pretty tough for me this past week and I feel like I have an emotional tired that's going to take a LONG time to go away. But I know I have to keep moving forward because life is always going to have sad times and setbacks that come up every now and then. And as is always the case when things like this happen, the result for me is to live the best life possibly and refortify my determination to stick to my professional plans if for no other reason than because I'd rather die trying to achieve a goal, than die having let fear prevent me from trying!!!

Path residency is easy? WTF???

One of the really cool things that's happening as I get older is that I find myself having no problem at all NOT engaging in activities that waste my precious time. And after reading the titled quote on a web site for women premeds through Attending, I'm slowly starting to realize that I'm running out of places on the net to spend time, LOL!!!!

I've always wondered why people are so insecure as to downplay certain medical specialties as if that somehow makes them smarter than any other doctor. Yet, I've heard this from both Pathologists and medical students interested in Pathology, that their classmates/colleagues really look at Path as the step child of medicine. That is until it's YOUR tumor or that of someone you care about, that need's to be accurately D'xed. You know its a funny thing about being an idiot, you often don't realize how big of an idiot you really until it's really inconvenient, LOL!!

Speaking of idiots, it looks like Podlabs are finally getting their comeuppance thanks to the work of the ASCP, that's the America College of Clinical Pathology, which has been slightly successful getting those strip mall type places that claim expertise in all areas of Pathology, shut down. Just as Pathologist aren't "real" doctors, the work they do can done by anyone with a set of eyeballs and a good microscope! Of course, I've observed this for myself many times over the past 1.5 years with the Bitch PI at my old job who claimed to be a Neuropathologist with only a PhD in Biomedical Science. Now, one of the PI's I work with in my current gig actually calls herself a Pathologist though she's only completed a Preventative Medicine residency. My question is, how in the hell have Pathologists allowed this 'ish to go down???

Other news, the devil Tech appears to have decided to put her pitchforks down at least for a little while and is suddenly being real nice.Of course, we went through this before so I fully expect frankenstein to turn back into herself any day now. Which has me thinking, why do so many people seem mad as hell all the time? Life is too short for that!!!

We also interviewed what I'm calling a Jim Carey Pathologist and what can I say, I think he's a cool dude! He's boarded(Path boards are some of the hardest to pass, contrary to what "real" doctors think), has a PhD, and is young and hungry!! Of course the downside to all this is that he may be one of those super duper work alcoholic types, that expects everyone around him to do the same. The good news for me is that I don't have to answer to him and in fact, he's being given space in MY lab, LOL!!! Let me stop acting like I'm on a power trip, I fully understand that it's a good idea to have positive working relationships with EVERYONE I come in contact with, while making sure they understand that we're colleagues .

MCAT study is going pretty well, though I've pretty much had to start all over again in general chemistry (can't figure out why organic "sticks" so much better), relearning everything I did before. But I'm happy to say that my careless errors are slowly but surely starting to become a thing of the past!!!!

Lab Manager who does no lab work?

The fact is that in science if you want to make great money, you'll eventually have to come out of the lab. I just didn't expect it to come so soon since I was told that my job would involve a lot more lab work than it actually does. The thing is that I'm at my computer and in meetings so much during the day, that my knees are starting to hurt!!! At this point, I've honestly only done 3 procedures using my hands, that's 3 procedures in 1 month! And that's not to say that what I have been doing isn't important, it's just that I didn't expect this to happen to me at this point. But apparently IO'd better get used to it since I plan for my salary to only increase from this point forward!!!

Of course, I'm getting a REAL good lesson in "people" once again, and find my Achilles, working for and with a lot of women, aching from all the $hit I'm once again observing. But I'll say it again, make yourself a doormat at the onset and that's what you'll be for the remainder of your time there! Anhoo, it's not anything particularly outrageous I'm seeing, I just will never get why some people feel the need to remind you that: 1) They're in charge and that 2) If you screw up, they'll put their foot in your hindparts, LOL!!!

Moving on, the tech from hell is still proudly wearing her torns and pitchfork, but I'm learning to handle it pretty well. The issue that I was warned could potentially be bad and which is turning out to be the case, is that this woman comes from a culture/country that tends to immigrate to this country and adopt ALL the negative stereotypes about brown people from the moment they get off the plane/boat. You know I tell people all the time, I'd MUCH rather deal with a hillbilly from the back woods of Tennessee, than someone from New Delhi with a similar "belief system", because the level of racial prejudice is often 1 zillion times worse!!!. And if she were really intelligent it wouldn't be so bad, but because she's not nearly as smart as she thinks she is, it's really, REALLY bad!! Arrogant ignorance has and will NEVER be pretty, LOL!!! But if you've graduated from a top 10 school and have been "in the business" for almost 15 years, then I expect you to know that when you're standardizing an antibody for experimental use, you should use a known positive control when it's available!!! Thing is, I had to watch her make this mistake so I could justify why she's no longer tasked with these duties any longer, and the hundreds of dollars this lab has wasted because she didn't know what the hell she was doing is mind blowing! But the fact is that not everyone with a science degree is cut out to do science, at least not research anyway!!! Some folks should stick to the cookie cutter lab environments like those found in hospital and commercial path labs, and leave the research to others.

OK, I think I'm done venting about that for now!! Now about my MCAT prep, just 2 words sums it up: NON EXISTENT!!! Honestly, adapting to my new gig has been a little more stressful than I anticipated as has getting acclimated to having a high school student in my midst. So, I've put myself on a once/week schedule until things normalize somewhat (which for a working Mom, is NEVER gonna really happen), but I think you know what I mean. :) Yesterday, it was biology/immunology review which was as much for the fact that I'm Immuno heavy in my new gig, as the fact that after getting to the bookstore, I realized I left my chemistry books at home! So I found a very nifty Physio book at on sale for like 8 bucks, and proceeded to get my review "on"!!!