Saturday, February 5, 2011

Black "tiger mom" meets unruly teenager!

Most days I throughly enjoy being the Mom to a teenager, but this past week was the most trying ever (and unfortunately, I'm still in the middle of it as I write this)!

There was an article a few weeks back by a Yale Law professor who calls herself "Tiger Mom" that many American mothers took offense to. I didn't because while I did think that a few of her parenting methods were abusive (like not allowing a kid to use the bathroom or eat until they played a piece of music perfectly), I also understand minority parents doing everything they can to make sure their kids grow up being prepared for a world which is going to very likely hold their race against them. I'm familiar with this type of parenting because two of my daughter's best friends are Asian, one Chinese the other Indian. Not long ago, my daughter's chinese friend commented that I parent like a Chinese mother, and I felt that was one of the highest compliments I'd ever received as a parent! The fact is that Chinese mothers don't play the radio, which is one very strong reason why so many Chinese kids excel academically and in everything else they do. I also see the same kinds of parenting style in African and Caribbean immigrant parents which is why med and grad schools often have more blacks from these backgrounds than american born Blacks. So, it isn't strange to me that people who come to this country are taking of opportunities that many of the rest of us, especially american born Blacks, take for granted and that's just a fact!!!

Moving on to my parenting woes, my kid flunked her honors geometry final exam and ended up with a C for a final grade (down from an A), and unfortunately, it's a grade colleges and universities are going to see, both the failed exam grade and the "C" grade. Now my kid , with her high genius level IQ that she inherited father, is by far smarter than I ever thought I was, and attends a school in the best public school system in the country. So the question I'm asking is what is the 'effing problem here? I'll tell what it is, too much TV time, too much texting, too much computer game time and not enough study time. But good 'ol Black tiger mom can fix it and you can trust me on that!

Moving on, this past week at work was off the chain in that I'm starting to feel like I'm in the exact environment I was in on the job I was fired from back in 2009. But at the same time, I KNOW there's an amazing opportunity for growth for me, so I'm gonna hang in there, do my best, and let the chips fall where they may!

In sadder news, the mother of a friend of mine is very near death and as sad as it is, it really does help me keep a perspective with the shit I'm dealing with on the job and with my kid. Life is extremely short and we really do have a lot of power in how we choose to deal with the negative things that come up in our lives. So when I found myself becoming overwhelmed with work BS, I reminded myself that in the overall picture of things, this is just a job, a means to and end and that I have a far brighter future ahead. And if I dropped dead tomorrow due to the stress, they'd have a replacement for me in no time!! The fact is that as difficult as times are for me job wise, someone out there has it far worse. I also remember thinking when I saw this job advertised that God had a plan for me to have it and that sometimes when God teaches us a lesson, it's bittersweet (or just bitter in this case, LOL!!). So my best bet is to continue to do my job well, keep my head held high, and when the time comes, move on to the bigger and better things in my VERY bright future!!

No comments:

Post a Comment